Be sure to see Paul Rudnick's highly entertaining imagining of yet another public "apology" by a politician, news of whose indiscretions has gone viral. Here's the first paragraph of Rudnick's "Shouts and Murmurs" piece in this week's New Yorker magazine. Be sure to read it all here.
As the senior alderman of the East Chemply, Pennsylvania, Town Board of Overseers, I, Walter K. Heblinger, would like to apologize to my constituents, and most especially to my family and my beloved wife, Kirsten, for sexting a nude photograph of myself to various citizens, and I would particularly like to apologize for circling my genitals, in the photograph, with red lipstick and adding vibrating exclamation points, thunderbolts, and the word “Yowza!” I would also like to apologize to my mother, Sylvia Heblinger, of Tassament, New Hampshire, for allowing her full-length oil portrait to appear directly over my nude left shoulder, and for permitting an unknown hacker to Photo-shop horns onto her forehead, along with a dialogue balloon reading, “Give it to me now."
Read it all here.
